The Last Exorcism

Here's something you may not know about me – I only really hate three things in this world: old people, puppies, and scary movies. It's true. I hate scary movies. Always have; always will.

I just don't enjoy the experience of being frightened or startled. I find it unpleasant and I don't know why people pay $12 for the experience. Needless to say, I have never been a big fan of the horror movie genre. I find these movies fall into one of two categories of unpleasantness: (1 )Stupid people doing stupid things resulting in a stupid movie (See any slasher franchise) or (2) Genuinely frightening (The Exorcist, Amityville Horror, It). The second category tends to involve supernatural thrillers involving demons or evil spirits and this invariably freaks me out for a good two to three weeks after seeing it.

So when my colleagues at CBC Information Morning assigned The Last Exorcist as our next on air review, I knew I was in for another unpleasant movie-going experience. And that's exactly what I got. What I didn't know however, was why. I thought it would be a category 2 situation but instead turned into category 1. This is remarkable considering how great this movie started out.

The Last Exorcist takes the form of a mockumentary that follows Cotton Marcus (Patrick Fabian), a huckster country preacher who is more showman than man-of-God. His greatest talent as a showman is faking exorcisms. He still believes he is doing a good deed because if the people truly believe they have had demons cast out of them, they can go on living their lives.

But after he reads about a young boys death while having an exorcism performed on him, he has decided that he is getting out of that racket for good. But not before he exposes it for the smoke-and-mirrors con game that he knows it to be. So he's decides he's going to do one more phony exorcism and let a camera crew follow him, documenting the key parts of scam as he goes along. The case involves a 16 year-old girl named Nell (Ashley Bell) who appears to suffer from demonic possession. This will be Cotton's last exorcism.

What director Daniel Stamm has done beautifully here is set up a con-man-about-to-meet-the-real-thing story where we genuinely sympathize with the con man. We believe Cotton is basically a decent man who is performing a service for people who want it. He's simply trying to provide for his family, at one point saying "I used to wish for my own evangelical TV program but right now I'd just like to have health insurance."

So Cotton and his team meet Nell, her uber-fundamental, father Louis (Louis Herthum) and overly intense brother Caleb (Caleb Landry Jones). Cotton goes through his whole routine, faking bed shaking and shrieks as he does his act. He believes it to be a success and when he finishes counting his thick wad of bills for another job well done, he goes back to the hotel for a good night's sleep.

And this is where Cotton's plan goes awry.

Nell shows up at Cotton's motel in the middle of the night only she's not quite Nell. She's nowhere near the head-spinning, pea-soup puking girl that Linda Blair portrayed in the 1973 classic. But there is clearly something not right with this Nell. What Cotton does next is very telling. Instead of assuming genuine possession, he rushes her to the hospital assuming there must be something physically wrong with her. At his core, he still believes in secular explanations.

At this point, this film has my complete and undivided attention. It has set up a beautiful two part narrative question: is Nell really suffering from demonic possession and if so, can the con man summon enough genuine faith to save her? Very few movies have so skilfully set up the second half of the movie for what has to be a rich and rewarding payoff. The only thing that is missing in this film is a rich and rewarding payoff.

Without going into too many plot points, the movie never fully realizes its potential in the con man vs. real demons story. There is one brief scene in the barn where the demon seems to make an appearance and taunts Cotton for his lack of faith. But it never goes any further than that.

MAJOR SPOLIER WARNING HERE!!!!

The entire third act feels like it was stolen from The Blair Witch Project (1999). It involves lots of shaky-cam POV shots as they run through the woods trying to identify the location of certain screams. And when they stumble upon the source of the screams, the movie rushes to a lightning fast and unsatisfying ending. The filmmakers thought they were executing a nice reveal but in going out of their way to deliver this twist reveal, they abandoned what was working so well before. This ending doesn't answer either of the fundamental story questions addressed above.

Was she really possessed? This question becomes moot when you see the ending of this movie. Does Cotton find his genuine faith? Again, never answered and not relevant in this ending. So bottom line, this movie fails miserably in delivering on the promise of its set up.

It's a shame too because there was a lot to like in this film. Fabian and Bell were riveting in their scenes together. These were two really solid performances that sadly went to waste.

But at least the movie confirmed my long-held belief that I don't enjoy scary movies. As for the other things I mentioned off the top, I was just joking.

I don't hate puppies.